a piece of my heart

This is going to be a little bit of a change from the regular "stuff" I choose to write about.
I am currently doing a study on the book of James, not the apostle, Jesus' younger half brother. It is a Beth Moore study whom I absolutely adore and  cannot begin to describe how much I learn from her. In the last two months I have probably learned more about the Bible than maybe my entire life. I am not sure what the motivation is, but I am loving this time of learning in my life.

Well, I was enjoying it.

The book of James is tough to swallow! You can turn to it right between Hebrews and 1 Peter, don't miss it though.You can easily skip over this five chapter book. It is chalk full of hard lessons if you are really looking. Of course, just skimming it, it seems pretty common sense and an easy book to read in about 15 minutes (or less) and then not think about it for the rest of the day. Which I have tried doing, trust me! There are several lessons to take from James. In the first chapter James tells us:

Consider it pure joy, my brother, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish it work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

James 1:2-5

When tempted, no one should say, 'God is tempting me.' For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

James 1:13-15

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

James 1:19-20

There are many more lessons throughout the book of James, believe it or not there are more in the first chapter. Which brings me to the reason I am writing. Towards the end of chapter one of James under the heading Listening and Doing it reads:

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks in the mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it--he will be blessed in what he does.

James 1:22-25

This verse almost brought me to my knees while in bible study today. How often do I "look intently into the perfect law that gives freedom?" Intently, never. How often do I leave the sermon on Sunday morning and not think of the message again? Too many times to count. How often do I do what I have heard? Do I have to answer this?! 

I am " the man who looks in the mirror and, after looking at himself, 

goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like." 

I hardly want to open the book of James again. It is so painful to see the truth of what I am. 

Praise God for his precious son, our Messiah, the Lord Jesus Christ. 

The first chapter of James ends with this sentence: "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."  James 1:27

I am only in the third week of the study of James, and this last week of study was tough for me. There were several times I just didn't understand what Beth or the Bible were trying to say. That scares me. To me that means I don't have the knowledge or wisdom to comprehend something new. On one hand that is okay, I know we are all a work in progress. On the other, it just tells me how much more growing (seeing more of that man in the mirror than I want to)I have to do. 

My prayer is that I will not be polluted by the world. That I may be set apart for you Lord. I ask that I may grow in wisdom to the one who gives generously to all without finding fault. Help me to find ways that I can look after orphans and widows in their distress. Thank you for opening me eyes to the man in the mirror, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. I want to look intently into the perfect law that gives freedom. In your sons precious name, Amen. 

"...humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you."

Be the Church Sunday

Last August, our church tried something new by the name of "Be the Church Sunday." Instead of having a normal Sunday, with three services and Sunday School, we had one short service and were sent into the community to be the hands and feet of Christ. It was a huge success! So this year we wanted bigger! Instead of one day it has turned into an entire week. We have committed to re-roofing 5 different houses in our community. We were also encouraged to do something else. Once again, we didn't have the (now four) morning services. There was one short service and then we were sent into the community. Our adult small group also wanted to do something a little bigger than last year.
Last year, we went to Dunkin Donuts, bought coffee and donuts, and took them to the local animal shelter, a hospital ER, and a crisis nursery. Did we do something nice? Did it take time and money? Yes and yes, but it wasn't as big as we wanted it to be. We were determined to do something this year that took a little more effort and impacted a bigger group of people.
We decided we were going to prepare dinners for a local homeless shelter. We all went to the grocery store (Aldi, our groups personal favorite!) and purchased all of the items needed. We then went to Brittany and Jeremy's house to prepare the meals. We made four baked spaghetti's and four chicken pot pies. Each entree feeding at least 30 people. Even better, it was less expensive to buy the items and feed more people than it cost each couple last year just to pass out donuts and coffee. Still even better, we had a great time doing it! We all agreed this was more up our ally. We even decided we were going to start preparing meals for homeless shelters once a month! I love our small group! We all want to do more for our church, our community and most importantly our awesome God!
Here are a few photos I took to document our "Be the Church Sunday."
Some of the ingredients we started with.

Chopping, dicing, browning...
   
Stirring and posing (of course!)
  
My job was un-canning and dumping.

Preparing all the food.
   
                                                Chicken Pot Pie              Baked Spaghetti

Group photo of our small group, minus one couple, but they were there in spirit!

Jeremy and Brittany were so nice to let us come in and mess up their kitchen. 

They are a pretty awesome couple and the reason our small group gets anything done! 

Speaking of awesome! Brittany recently started her own blog! 

I am very excited to see what goes on in that wonderful, crafty, intelligent, Jesus-loving head of hers! 

To end on a different, more awkward note. Here is a photo of our husbands being themselves...

Romans 12:10-13

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality." Romans 12:10-13

We were asked to memorize these verses before going on our trip to Belize. Although I did not make a point to do so, I will now. My prayer is that I can live these verses out everyday. With my family, friends, co-workers and strangers.

I have so many stories to share about Belize. Stories of miracles, heartbreak, love, poverty, sickness, Jesus, children and friendship. But when I sit down to collect my thoughts, stories, memories and photos I draw a blank.

Here goes...
Belize is a third world country. Poverty is everywhere. You are always surrounded by it. Yet they are some of the richest people I know. The smallest gesture of kindness makes their faces light up. They are never disappointed because they have no other option. They are happy with one change of clothes and being fed once a day. They know the meaning of family and are willing to be a helping hand without being asked. They are the definition of hard working. They are are the ones Jesus is speaking of in Mark 10:31 "...many who are first will be last, and the last first."

There are so many still there that need to be cured of their sicknesses and told about the love, 

our savior, Jesus Christ has for us.  

These 60 people became the quickest best friends I have ever acquired.  We came from all over the country for one common goal, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, and we succeeded! I miss each and every one of them. I miss worshiping with them every morning and enjoying dinner with them every night. 

I am happy to be home with my beautiful son and wonderful husband, but my heart longs to be back in Belize.

I will go again. And I hope to take more people with me. 

Rich and poor have this in common: the LORD is the MAKER of them ALL. Proverbs 22:2

On Sunday, I am boarding a plane that is headed to Dallas, Texas only to board another plane headed to the Stann Creek District of Belize.

(I am probably suppose to give credit for posting this map of Belize but I don't know how so here is how I found it. I went to google, typed Belize map in the search bar and it appeared. I hope that's enough credit....)

I will be helping with a VBS for some of the village children of Belize. I have so many thoughts and emotions running through me right now. I feel excitement yet at times I am paralyzed with fear. Excitement because I have wanted to go on another mission trip since I came home from one in Juarez, Mexico, 8-years-ago. Fear because 1) I HATE flying and 2) I don't want anything to ruin this trip (i.e. my attitude). If nothing else comes from this experience I pray that the love and patience Jesus shows us everyday is shown through me, and the other 60+ in our group, to the Belizean people. I don't want my own selfish motives or spoiled American views to get in the way. I want to show these people they are just as important (if not more) to our Heavenly Father than some girl that never wonders where her next meal will come from or which of the 100 outfits in my closet I am going to wear today. I want them to know the Almighty Lord loves them more than comprehensible.

To be 100% honest I have some very selfish reasons for going on this trip as well. I want to come home with a renewed appreciation for my life, my family and my relationship with the Lord. I want to realize the things I stress about on a daily basis are taking the precious joys of life away. I want to be encouraged that I can make a difference in the Lord's kingdom just by loving others. On a lighter note, I am looking forward to a week without my phone or computer!

How it all came to be:

My friend, Carrie Webb, first found out about International Servants from a friend of hers that traveled with them before. She asked if I would like to join her on her first mission trip and it didn't take long for me to make a decision. My biggest concern was the expenses that went along with a trip like this. Of course, no amount of money will keep Gods message of salvation a secret. I sent out many fundraising letters with only 3-4 return donations, leaving a wide gap between what I had and what I needed to go on such a trip. I quickly realized I was going to have to put a little more effort into this. Luckily, I have a wonderful group of supportive friends and family. We rallied together and decided a garage sale would be our next plan. I received many wonderful items for our sale, very little of it junk. I think I had set a goal of about $500 over the three day sale. When the first day of our sale came to an end we were just shy of that goal by $100! By the end of Saturday, the last day, we had raised almost $1400!!! I still cannot believe that I was dumb enough to put a limit on what God does and will do for His message to be heard.

I will say that the garage sale wasn't that much more of an effort on my part. I had a great group of woman (and my husband) right beside me the whole time. I am so grateful to my mom, Aunt Ann, Aunt Sara, Ruth Ann, Mary Ann, Rebekah and our Claire Bear for being so helpful and willing to to do anything to get me to Belize. Thank you so much for all of your time, money and love.

I don't want the week to go by too fast, but I look forward to sharing stories and photos from my trip to Belize. I also want to thank everyone that has donated to this trip and please continue to pray for our group and the hearts of the Belize people.

If you want more information on the mission I am traveling with, it is International Servants.